Evaluation of Leena's P1 speech

Leena, you lead such a colourful life and you've certainly been to places! We are indeed very glad that Katong TMC is now one of the threads in the tapestry of your life.

I shall share with you the three strong points you already have as a speaker, using the letter S.

The first S is for structure. Your speech was well-structured with a clear opening, body and conclusion.
There were 3 main points in your speech and you indicated them clearly by using linking words such as 'the first thread is..', 'another thread is..' and 'the last thread'..

The second S is sense of humour.  You made us laugh when sharing about your role as a mother, how 'the pay is non-existent, the benefits are scarce and the hours are long' and on another occasion when you shared an anecdote about using the trump card against your husband.  You are able to weave humour into your speech and use it naturally.

The third S is for sensational use of language.  You are a polished speaker and you used a beautiful analogy comparing your life to tapestry.  Your theme was consistent with the use of words and phrases like 'the threads are vibrant', 'woven together', 'unfinished tapestry' and 'continues to weave'.

There are two areas for improvement I would like to suggest, using the acronym CD.

Firstly, C for create impact in  your introduction.  You started with a whole long list of activities such as 'riding in a jeep', 'hiking', 'biking' and 'trekking'. You can create impact by using dramatic gestures and vocal variety when talking about each of the activity.

Secondly, D is for dress to impress.  The toastmasters platform is a formal one and we advise speakers to dress formally.  Our audience form their first impression of us within the first few seconds they see us and dressing to impress as a speaker is as important as delivering a well-prepared speech.

In conclusion, you have many strengths as a speaker and they include structure, sense of humour and sensational use of language. Learn to create impact in your introductions and dress to impress and you will be on your way to becoming a sensational speaker.

Evaluation of P4 speech @ AIA Changi on 13 January 2011

Thank you for sharing with us a wonderful story entitled 'Bitter things taste sweet' about how little things can make a big difference.  Project 4 requires you to focus on the use of language to enhance your speech.

Today you performed well in three areas:
(1) simple, short and clear words were used;
(2) sentences used were generally short, simple and easy to understand;
(3) story-telling involving a personal experience was an excellent choice as it helped you to avoid jargon.

There is no shortcut to success in public speaking.  To become an outstanding, exceptional and brilliant speaker, you need to invest time and effort to write, re-write and rehearse your speech before you deliver it.

Allow me to share with you 3 areas of improvement in terms of your language use:
(1) Use vivid, descriptive words that create mental images in the minds of the audience.
For example, 'There was a tent outside the school. It was teeming with parents.  The whole place was abuzz with excitement.' OR
'The children were singing with great gusto while their parents looked on beaming with pride.'

(2) Use rhetorical devices such as alliteration, similes and triads.
For example, 'children with chubby cherubic faces', 'they devoured the food like ravenous wolves' and 'we were delighted to witness their talent, passion and enthusiasm'.

(3) Use proper grammar and pronunciation.
Some grammatical mistakes:
'quite further from the city', 'they have a tent outside the school', 'the parents are there' (instead of 'were there'), 'I didn't expect there to be that many'...

In this evaluation, I have focused on your language use.  I would strongly recommend that you re-do this speech.  Change the speech title, craft the speech, and learn to harness the power of words to give a speech that will move hearts.

I know some toastmasters feel it's such a 'shame' or embarrassment to be told to repeat a speech project. But I assured the speaker that the true objective is about learning and mastering the specific skill each project is focusing on.  There is no point in moving on to the next speech when you have not reasonably mastered the current skill.  I even promised to help her edit her script if she is willing. Unfortunately, that was not to be.  Most toastmasters seek the easy way out by breezing through the project speeches regardless of the standard of speaking or whether the objectives have been met. That is a sad, sad state of affairs.

AP2 Resources for Entertainment from The Entertaining Speaker Manual

why didn't I think of it earlier? I spoke about Susan Boyle and Zoe Tay in my AP2 speech. I should have rounded it up by sharing about Lashunda Rundles, 2008 world champion of public speaking - the first woman to win since 1986 and the first African American woman to ever win this title.

Her winning speech was about speaking up. In an interview, she wrote:

The theme of my speech was to speak up. People sit in silence so much afraid to express themselves and it often diminishes the quality of their lives and those that they love. The fear people have has to be overcome and the purpose has to be the passion.

I chose this theme because growing up, I saw so many people abused because of their silence. I witnessed people be broken because they would not speak in their own defense. Most painfully, I watched my mother die from cancer. When she began to finally complain, it was too late. I am sure that she had symptoms long before she revealed it to us. She was the kind of person who would grin and bear it. She was so giving that she didn’t ever want to feel like she was imposing on anyone. I believe that her silence allowed the cancer to take [her] life because it was about one month from her diagnosis until her death.

In addition, what I learned from her is that our words make a lasting impression on this earth. Her words still live in me and the values she instilled in me live in me and will live on through my son.

http://sixminutes.dlugan.com/lashunda-rundles-2008-world-champion-public-speaking/

Just like Susan Boyle, Lashunda has a special place in my heart. She's my inspiration!

AP2 Resources for Entertainment from The Entertaining Speaker Manual

Objectives: 

(1) Draw entertaining material from sources other than your own personal experience.

(2) Adopt your material to suit your topic, your own personality and the audience.

Time:  5 - 7 minutes

OMG

The plump, plain-looking, middle-aged lady with grey hair ambled onto the stage. When asked by one of the judges what was her dream, she replied matter-of-factly that she would like to be a famous singer like Elaine Page.  You could hear the sniggers from the audience and see the incredulous, cynical looks on their faces. 'What audacity! How unrealistic! Far-off' are probably some of the thoughts that crossed their minds.  But when the lady opened her mouth to sing, her strong powerful vocals took everyone by surprise.  There was collective jaw-dropping.   After her rendition of the song 'I dreamed a dream', the audience erupted into thunderous applause and even gave the singer a standing ovation.  That singer was Susan Boyle, who became an overnight sensation as her performance video on youtube garnered 2.5 million views within 72 hours.

Good evening, fellow toastmasters, that was Susan's OMG - one moment of glory.  When you win a contest, it can open doors of opportunity for you, just like it did for Susan.  She went on to place 2nd in the contest Britain's Got Talent, produce two albums and in September this year, Susan Boyle was officially recognised by Guinness World Records as having had the fastest selling debut album by a female artist in the UK, and was also awarded the record for being the oldest person to reach number one with a debut album in the UK. She is 48 years old.

Boyle's performance has been hailed as a triumph over a youth culture that often dismisses middle-aged women. Her OMG has catapulted her from anonymity to instant fame.  What an inspiration!  There is yet hope for me.

Nearer home, we also have a classic story of rags to riches. Zoe Tay, whom I'm sure all of you are familiar with, joined the biennial talent-search contest Star Search in 1988.  She emerged as the first Star Search champion.  From the daughter of a pig farmer, she became a well-loved local actress who starred in countless serials and has been voted as Top 10 Most Popular Female Artiste for 10 consecutive years.  Zoe Tay's OMG in the Star Search contest certainly and completely changed her life!

There are many in our midst who also enjoy taking part in contests, not singing contests, not acting contests but speech contests! In fact, there is a term for people who are addicted to taking part in contests - they are called contest junkies. Some junkies I know are Wee Meng, Seh Leng, Richard Sng, Wekie Tay to name a few.

Wee Meng once told me that he has collected more than 60 trophies in his 12 years of experience as a toastmasters.  Wow! 60? Anyone would be impressed by not his wife.  All these trophies are taking up so much space and only collecting dust. Can you please stop taking part in contests? Give other people a chance! That's what his wife reportedly said.  Luckily I only have 20 trophies and my husband hasn't said that to me yet.

I have a confession to make - I am a contest junkie too! When I took part in the District 80 Evaluation Contest 2 years ago, it was my first time reaching a district level contest.    Unfortunately, I was the first contestant, I had too many points in my evaluation speech and I made a fatal mistake.  I insulted the test speaker, who happened to be a very important person. He was our International Director.  It was painful to not win anything in a contest but it was certainly an enlightening experience because now I know how to keep my evaluation speech within the time limit and how to insult people tactfully, I mean share constructive and encouraging feedback.

The following year was the most painful time in my journey as a toastmaster because I was appointed as an Area Governor,  and hence banned from taking part in contests. I could only watch others contest while I was itching to be on stage as a contestant. I suffered serious withdrawal symptoms. I would write contest speeches while daydreaming or dream that I took part in a contest and won.

Once my AG stint was over, I jumped straight into the contest ciruit again. Joni was back with a vengeance.  I wanted to challenge myself to reach the District 80 Evaluation contest again and be placed.   On 27 November 2010, during the District 80 Evaluation Contest, I wielded my weapon of alliterative triads and walked away with the champion trophy.  That was my OMG!

Who would have imagined that this once reticent, diffident and bashful girl would become a District 80 Evaluation Champion one day? Not only have I stretched myself beyond what I imagined possible, winning the contest has also opened doors for me. I have been invited by two trainers to join their organisation.  

In conclusion, if you have a chance to take part in a contest, go for it! It can help you discover your talent, open doors of opportunities and even change your life.  Go grab your OMG!

                  x                     x                     x                       x                     

Points for improvement by Lim Seh Leng:

(1) use ONLY material from sources other than your own personal experience as stated in the first objective.

(2) avoid distracting hand-gestures such as finger-pointing and moving the hand up and down

(3) dramatize the speech further for greater impact and more entertainment value

Voted BEST SPEAKER for the evening! 

AP1 The Entertaining Speech from The Entertaining Speaker Manual

Just as I was racking my brains over this project, a friend suggested that I use my PA contest speech for it (http://odysseydiscovery.blogspot.com/2010/10/pa-humorous-speech-contest-2010.html).  Perfect! So after rehearsing the speech a few times, I was ready to go. I had re-titled it "Happily Ever After"

Objectives:
(1) Entertain the audience by relating a personal experience.
(2) Organize an entertaining speech for maximum impact.
Time:  5 - 7 minutes

Unfortunately, the audience at NUS Alumni consisted mostly of young, single people and few could relate to my experiences about marriage.  Absolutely no one laughed at the jokes or funny anecdotes, unlike the audience at the PA contest.  It was quite terrifying and disheartening, like a stand-up comedian facing a silent audience.

My evaluator and mentor Wee Meng suggested gauging the audience needs and learning to change the angle of the speech to engage the audience so they can identify with the speech material better.

PA Humorous Speech Contest 2010

The finals of the PA 7th Humorous Speech Challenge Cup 2010 was held on Sat 2 Oct 2010 at Nee Soon South CC. I had lost all confidence of winning the contest as the other contestants I had heard at the Preliminary round were very competent speakers and my speech seemed lacklustre in comparison.

I decided to write a new speech for the finals but could not summon the energy to do so till the night before the contest.  This is the first time I enter a contest so unprepared.  I had to use the old speech title 'Are You Ready?' as it was already printed in the program booklet even though my new speech title was 'How to Train a Man'. During the speech, I forgot my lines: I lost the 2nd paragraph and some lines in the closing.  Thankfully, I was able to recover quite well.  The audience laughter was loudest during the part about rewards for men, especially the 2nd F.  

Surprise ending? I was placed 2nd runner-up!!! I had left the contest early to go back to work and when I received congratulatory smses from my friends and fellow Katong members, I was astounded, stunned and speechless.  


Here's the speech that helped me win 3rd prize:

HOW TO TRAIN A MAN

Once upon a time, there was a beautiful girl called Snow White.  She eventually met her Prince Charming and they lived happily ever after.

Good afternoon, distinguished judges, ladies and gentlemen, how many of you believe in happily ever after?

(Wow so many innocent souls out there! or All of you are as cynical as I am?)

When I was a young and innocent little girl, I believed in "happily ever after" but not anymore, especially NOT after I got married because the Prince Charming I had married had somehow mutated into Mr Alarming!! When I asked my married girlfriends, it seems this mutation is quite universal.

Before marriage, my man was absolutely endearing, invariably patient and unconditionally helpful.  For example, he would help me mark my students' assignments (I used to be a teacher) or go the extra mile to buy some food I was craving for.  When we go out on dates, he would tell me how beautiful I looked.  Now I even have to ask him what he thinks of my new haircut because he would barely notice.

Seeing how many celebrity couples have split up and even friends going through divorce, I realised marriage requires hard work. I read up all kinds of marriage self-help books and came to the conclusion: I have to train my man so that we could live, if not happily, at least tolerably together ever after.

Based on the collective wisdom of many authors, the secret to training a man involves CPR. C for consequences, P for punishment and R for Rewards.  

The prelude to this rigorous training is first to establish what kinds of behaviours are off-limits in the marriage.  For example, do not leave your dirty socks or clothes on the floor, place them in the laundry basket.  Do not leave your wet towel lying around, place it on the railing in the toilet.  When I talk to you about my problems, just listen, don't offer solutions.  Of course the list will differ for each couple.  You will find that some actions lend themselves to logical consequences.  If you leave your dirty clothes on the floor instead of in the laundry basket, then they don't get washed.  After a while, he should get the message.  Impose a corresponding consequence for each offending action and keep to it consistently.  

For actions that do not have logical consequences, that's when PR comes in.  You impose your own consequences in the form of punishment or reward.

There are many ways to punish a man but the 3 most effective ways are emotional blackmail, silent treatment and hide-and-seek.

Emotional blackmail includes crying, throwing tantrums or acting hysterical and should be used sparingly only for serious offences for it to be effective.  

Silent treatment involves totally ignoring him for at least 24 hours, if it's only 2 or 3 hours, it won't be effective. In fact, one website eHow.com recommends 1-2 days of silent treatment, and increase to 2-3 days if the offence is repeated.

Hide-and-seek means you hide, he seeks.  This is my personal favourite.  It involves hiding something of great importance to him such as the air-con or tv remote control  When he asks for it, 'Dear, where is the remote control?', just feign ignorance.

Punishment must be painful for it to be effective.  On the other hand, when your man performs well, do reward him as positive reinforcement.  I suggest the 3Fs.

The first F is for food.  It has been said that the way to a man's heart is through his stomach.  Keep a copy of makan sutra at home and let him know which dish or recipe he will get to enjoy for his efforts.

The second F is for fantasy.  Keep a copy of karma sutra at home and let him know which position he gets to enjoy for being good.  Better still, play dress up as a nurse, schoolgirl or sex siren (on different occasions of course!) to give him the illusion he is making out with different women.  I am sure this will be an effective antidote to unfaithfulness.

The 3rd F is freedom.  Give him freedom to do whatever he wants but within limits of course.  He gets some 'me-time' to enjoy his macho activities like watching soccer or fishing with his buddies.

So there you have it: CPR - the way to train a man.  However, there is a caveat.  There are some things you just can't train a man to do.  For example, it has been socially confirmed and scientifically proven that men can only do one thing at a time.  I can't talk to my husband when he is driving because he will miss a turn and say it's my fault.  According to author Allan Pease, men's brains are specialised, compartmentalised, and configured to concentrate on one specific dedicated task at once.  So no point training your man how to multi-task because he just won't get it.  

In conclusion, marriage is hard work.  Ladies, use CPR everyday to train your man so you can enjoy living with him under the same roof and perhaps even find your 'happily ever after'.

  

Humorous Speech Contests 2010: ARE YOU READY?

Having moved on from the role of Area Governor, I was looking forward to joining the contest circuit again and raring to go.  This speech about parenting had been brewing in my mind for a long time. 

I presented it at my club contest and it was a hit with the audience.  At the PA 7th Humorous Speech contest, I sailed through to the finals with the speech, although I felt it was lacklustre compared to the other speeches.  At the Area Z3 contest, I was 1st runner-up.  


Here's the speech. Enjoy reading it. =)

ARE YOU READY?           
                   

GOOD EVENING ladies and gentlemen,

How many of you here have kids?

How many of you here have kids but wish you didn’t?

(either respond: Looks like I'm the only honest person here tonight. 

Or Wow, I found my soulmates!)

For the lucky ones who do not have kids, who would like to have kids one day?

I’m sure you think babies are cute and adorable right?  Wrong!!

That is a misguided notion, a misconception, a myth.

Babies are cute and adorable only when (1) they belong to someone else and (2) you only need to spend 5 minutes with them.  Try being the main caregiver having to spend hours and hours with a baby day in and day out and you will certainly change your mind.

Potential parents, are you ready for the challenges of parenting? Tonight, allow me to enlighten you regarding the sacrifices and challenges of parenting from a mother's perspective.

First, the sacrifices.  As a parent, there are 3 Ses you must be prepared the sacrifice. The first S is SLEEP.  This unfortunately applies mostly to mothers. Do you know that new mothers develop enhanced sensitivity to sound? This has been scientifically proven to be part of women's maternal wiring. That means mothers wake easily even to the slightest rustle or whimper of the baby. Unlike the husbands who will just continue to snore and sleep on like a baby. The only time they will wake up in the middle of the night is during World Cup season.

The second S is a three-letter word. Yes, SEX!!! Which in all fairness, applies mostly to fathers.  Many husbands have lamented the fact that they are relegated to second place once baby comes along.  And babies are the biggest sex killer of all.  When mothers are exhausted with breastfeeding and feeling unsexy with all the postnatal weight gain, what is the last thing on their minds? That probably explains why the red light district in Geylang has such a thriving business.

The third S is SANITY.  A thousand and one things about bringing up kids will drive you crazy.  You can go crazy when baby cries and cries non-stop and nothing you do will pacify him. Or the food you have painstakingly prepared for baby ends up on the floor instead of in his mouth. Or when your preschooler comes home spewing some vulgarity he has picked up from school.  The list goes on and on. I can’t even begin to tell you the number of times I’ve felt like giving my kids away.  That is when you need to do some sanity-restoring activities like take a walk in the park, sing karaoke or join a speech contest to pour out your woes, like what I'm doing now.

Now that you’ve heard about the sacrifices of parenting, are you ready to hear about the challenges? Kids will challenge you in 3 ways: They will test your knowledge, they will try your patience and they will question your values.

Children, being creatures of curiosity, will constantly test your knowledge. Sometimes they will ask you the strangest questions. I’ve been asked by my kids: “Why is the moon following us?”; “What animals have no blood?”; “Why can't I see God?”; “Why is that woman so fat?” and so on. Children basically expect their parents to be experts in all fields be it science, zoology, or theology. Thankfully I can use the impromptu speaking skills I have learnt in Toastmasters when put on the spot.

Children try your patience. Do you know that kids love to dawdle especially when you are running late. The more you ask them to hurry, the slower they get. And when you give an instruction, you expect it to be followed NOW, but kids will take their own sweet time especially at bedtime. Joel, come to bed now. Wait mommy I’m hungry, I need to eat something. Or I’m thirsty, I need to drink some water. No wonder the Bible says, "Love is Patient". I'm sure God designed this verse with kids in mind.

Last but not least, kids will question our values. So often we tell our kids to do as we say, but they do as we do.  Which explains why we must be on our best role-model behaviour at all times!! That is such a tall order.  Once I reprimanded my boy, don't talk so rude to mommy, he asked me, "Then why you shout at grandma last time?" Oh boy, was I guilty.  Another time, while driving, a driver cut in front of me, causing me to jam on my brakes.  My 4-year-old son immediately verbalised my thought, "Stupid driver!!" Our children become who we are so unless we practise the values we preach, our kids will definitely question them.

All these challenges can really get you down and beseige you with feelings of frustration and failure.  I'm sure many parents here will agree with me that parenting is the hardest job in the world!

Now that you've heard all about the sacrifices and challenges of parenting, are you ready for it? Don't worry, I have the perfect solution for you.  To be prepared for parenting, we can introduce hands-on practice, like what we do in Toastmasters.  I happen to have 2 very cute and adorable boys who are 4 and 7 years old.  In the spirit of caring and sharing, I am happy to avail them for hire at a very special rate of $20 per day for a minimum of 3 days.  

If after 3 days of hands-on practice, you find the experience tolerable, or even pleasurable, then truly you are ready for the sacrifices and challenges of parenting, the hardest job in the world.